Why do you say that relationships these days are more important than ever?
This time in history could easily be called the Age of Relationship. Relationship is at the core of everything and although we are more connected then ever before because of revolutions like Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, cell phones, texting etc., the technology exacerbates our lack of deep connection, and magnifies our inability to relate or accept people who are not like us or don’t behave in ways we want them to. This is across the board – family, friends, co-workers, strangers.
This is where my work comes in. Nothing is more important to me than people being kind and respectful to one another and because of this I help turn struggling relationships, both personally and professionally, into relationships where the individuals understand each other, have more compassion and experience better daily interaction. I do this by teaching people about the 4 distinct Emotional Styles and how each person’s particular style influences their overall behavior in life — toward themselves and others.
Until people are aware of these particular Emotional Styles it’s more than likely that they will keep butting heads with each other – even those they are closest to!
What do you mean by Emotional Style?
An Emotional Style is how you want to be treated in your relationships as well as how you’re motivated to behave toward others. It is your innate way of being and plays an enormous role in your interactions – both emotionally and in the positive or negative tone of your communications.
How did you come to doing this work?
I have been doing relationship work with people for 15 years — intimate partnerships, between parents and kids, siblings, extended family members, friends, as well as in the working environment. It has always been my intention to help people get to the heart of their differences as quickly as possible — to drop the years of stories they hold onto and find the truth of what’s really going on in the present. And although the various processes I’ve used over the years were effective, nothing was as profound or as quick as the work I now use — which is based on my knowledge of the hands.
Of foremost importance for my work, there is one particular component in the hands that tells me everything I need to know about their Emotional Style and how they best communicate with people.
What is the difference between what you do and palm reading? Fortune telling?
First of all, there is no predicting of the future with this system of Hand Analysis. It is teachable, repeatable and demonstrable. There is absolutely no guesswork involved and everything that is determined from a person’s hands is unique to them and 100% accurate. This system gives you deeper insight into yourself, helps you understand why your life is the way it is, and suggests the shifts you can make that will support what your hands are indicating.
Do you have to be trained to facilitate?
Absolutely. Without training in this particular system there is no way of knowing what the hands are indicating. I studied with Kay Packard at the American Academy of Hand Analysis, receiving certification through four training levels.
I am in ongoing training with Richard Unger the founder of this system which he calls LifePrints hand analysis. He is also the author of LifePrints.
The depth of information that exists in the hands is incredible and Richard is a walking encyclopedia of this information. After graduating from Kay’s AAHA program I then went through her training to become an Associate Faculty and teacher with the AAHA.
What’s the benefit of all this?
With this information I can give people the exact guidance they need in their relationships, removing all guesswork. They have a clearer understanding about themselves and why they habitually behave in the ways they do. They can be exhibiting too much or too little of their personal Emotional Style. By knowing what side of the pendulum they’re hanging out on, they can make adjustments to get to the just right place for themselves – centered, if you will.
This adjustment gives them the opportunity to experience more personal happiness, have less stress and begin to ease the struggle they were having with another person. Just as important, they realize others have a personal Emotional Style too, which opens the door to more compassion and patience toward them. A curiosity develops about better understanding the other person — rather than being so quick to anger or frustration.
Knowing your Emotional Style allows you to communicate more easily what you want and need from another. You have the words to express how you want to be treated. You don’t have to feel the need to be someone different than who you innately are. You get to live your life in the most authentic way.
How can I determine my own Emotional Style?
Through a particular line in your hands called your heart line. It sits at the top of the palm starting under the pinky finger and travels across the hand, ending anywhere from the middle finger to the index finger. It can be curved or straight. The more curved the line the more emotion you will show, and the straighter it is the less you tend to share your deepest feelings.
How many heart line types are there?
There are four main heart lines:
- Passionate – This is someone who likes excitement, makes sure they get their needs met, they dislike being bored, they’re spontaneous and often the life of the party.
- Hermit – The hermit types have a difficult time sharing their feelings. They don’t like clinginess and they’re often busy working. They’re extremely loyal and will show their love for someone by the things they do more than with words.
- Romantic Idealist – These people are very thoughtful and considerate. In fact their considerateness can be an internal struggle sometimes because they don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings so they will think, think, think, about how they feel, feel, feel, not wanting to say the wrong thing to someone and to avoid conflict at all costs. They like deep and meaningful conversations.
- Big Heart – This person is nurturing, caring, requires connection and is empathetic toward others. He or she is a great listener and will show feelings easily.
Is this based in science?
Yes it is. It was during the early part of the 19th century when scientific
investigations into the different aspects of the hands started. In 1926 a doctor, Harold Cummins, came up with the name Dermatoglyphics, which means skin carvings. As Richard Unger, the founder of the particular hand analysis work that I do states in his book – Life Prints – Dermatoglyphics is a scientific term for the study of fingerprints and related lines and hand shape designations.
The hands are a window into your inner world. Divided into two parts – the soul’s agenda and the personality. Energetically, the hands actively reflect the past and the present. This process does not involve predicting the future. The lines in your hands form a map of the major neural pathways of your brain’s processing. As your thinking changes, as your beliefs change at a cellular level, so can the lines and other parts of your hand. This all reflects a person’s inherent personality traits.
The soul’s agenda is determined through the fingerprints which are created five months before you’re born and never change throughout your lifetime. They contain your life purpose, your life lessons and something called the life school — which represents the overall theme of your life and what you are here to master.
Do you find that most people behave in ways that align with their Emotional Style?
Interestingly, I’ve found that about 98% of the women with a Passionate heart line whom I’ve read for do not honor it and instead take on the role of the Big Heart. When I delve into this with them they explain how they were raised to focus more on others than themselves. But when they hear about the Passionate type, every single one of them resonates deeply with it and chooses to work on being more of their authentic heart type — finding great joy and peace doing so.
Conversely, the men that I’ve seen with this heart line have no problem behaving in ways that align with it.
The other 3 heart lines – Hermit, Big Heart and Romantic Idealist seem to be an Emotional Style that the owner relate to fairly easily. There are a few exceptions but nothing like what I’ve found with the Passionate type.
How can aligning or not aligning with your Emotional Style affect your closest relationships?
When you’re not in alignment with your main Emotional Style, then, to make another person happy, you sacrifice your most natural way of needing to be treated. Overtime, this can create feelings of resentment — and that’s when relationships start to fall apart. I’ve seen this happen many times. Moreover, it’s a challenge to express what’s going on when you don’t even know that you have a particular Emotional Style that feels best to you.
On the flip side, when you know and follow your natural heart type it gives you the ability to not only be your most authentic self, but to teach others how you most want to be treated and cared for. And, when you understand other people’s Emotional Styles then you can love and treat them in a way that feels best to them. You can work with them more easily — allowing for some leeway and patience throughout the day.
Ultimately, you learn how to speak each other’s emotional language. When both people honor the way they each want to be treated, loved, cared for, however you want to word it, then everybody wins because all needs are being met. It’s no longer about: I need you to treat me this way and I’m going to treat you the way I need to be treated. That doesn’t work so well.
How can knowing one’s Emotional Style make a difference in the work environment?
One of the biggest advantages comes from knowing whether you’re really cut out for a particular job. You may have the skills and abilities, but does it really fit your emotional and communication style? For instance, some Hermit types like to work alone, nose to the grindstone, don’t interrupt my flow. Instead, let’s say this person is thrown into a project where there’s a constant need for ongoing communication — with very little alone time. During stressful times, maybe upset feelings come up — which need immediate discussion to clear the air so the team can keep moving forward.
That could really drive Hermit types crazy and they could easily shut down, as a result not giving their best to the team. In turn, frustrating other team members who think this person isn’t a team player or doesn’t care — when that’s not necessarily true. The Hermit needs time to assess and understand what they’re feeling before comfortably sharing it with anyone else. Additionally, a Big Heart team member would likely be more willing to express feelings — but could take personally the Hermit’s behavior of being shut down.
How can I determine the Emotional Style of people in my life?
I teach a two-hour workshop that takes you through the entire process of being able to read not only your heart line but the heart line of people in your life. This workshop is offered in person as well as through a webinar.
And, if you put together a group of 4-8 people to do the workshop you will receive a free one-hour hand analysis session from me.
Are there other aspects in the hand that challenge one’s Emotional Style and affect relationships?
Most definitely. In fact these are called challenge markers and, depending on what particular markings show up in your hands, they can be the reason for certain behaviors in a relationship and why it’s difficult to honor your heart type. These markings are brought on from direct experiences you’ve had as you evolved in your life and how you reacted to those experiences. I want to be clear here that when I use the word relationship I’m not just referring to intimate relationships. I’m including relationships at work, with friends and various family members.
What is your greatest desire for people through this work?
For every human being to know his or her heart type — embrace it, be it, honor it, live it and perhaps, above all else, remember that all the people they come in contact with in their lives also have their own heart types that deserve to be respected and honored, as well.
How can I get started?
There are a number of ways you can begin to benefit from the Hand Analysis and Linda’s support with any relationship you’re struggling with:
One-hour Scientific Hand Analysis session
You’ll learn your own Emotional Style, Life Purpose, Life Lessons, Inherent Gifts and much more, helping you understand yourself better than ever before — and discover how to improve your personal and professional relationships.
Receive 3-months of ongoing support to experience loving and supportive relationships on a regular basis. This program includes a one-hour Scientific Hand Analysis session.
Secrets of the Heart Workshop
Learn everything about the 4 Emotional Styles and how to determine not only your style but that of others in your life.